February 07, 2010

if 2 girls kiss are they gay?

What do you tell a 6 six year old @ 10 o'clock in the morning when she asks "mommy, if a girl and a girl kisses does that make them gay?"

Uhm?!What?! Where did you learn that?!? That is what I wanted to screammed!! But I held my self back and took a deep breath...and another deep breath... and another...

Let me start out by saying that I DON'T have anything against Gays or Lesbians. And I knew that with todays society it was just a matter of time before that question will come up. I just didn't expect it now. I mean she is just 6!!!

I know that when I was growing up Gays and Lesbians was something unspoke of. It was a big taboo and no one will dare to talk about it. People were living in the dark. Hiding to the world and lying to themselves about what sex they were attracted to or who they loved.

Now a days things have change. People are still very reserve when it comes to the subject but more and more people talk about the subject and are not afraid to say "hey i'am a lesbian and i like women!".
But when my daughter asks me I just didnt know what to tell her.

I tried to remain as cool as possible and told her that it was true, that if a girl likes a girl (like mommy lloves daddy) then she was lesbian. I went on and told her that one day when she is older she will understand more about it. And that one day she will marry a handsome guy and she didnt have to worry about that kind of stuff. I mean she is just a little girl.

To my surprise she started crying saying that no boy would like to marry her and I am like WHAT?!

"Honey, you do not need to worry about boys wanting to marry you or not!" I said. I continued to explain to her that she was a beautiful girl and that when the time was right she will marry the man she likes.

Now this got me thinking: why in the world a 6 year old is worrying about who she marries? She is only 6!!!

I blame myslef for allowing her to watch movies in which the pretty princess marries the handsome prince. In which a 16 year old mermaid marries the guy her dad told her to forget about. For reading her a story of how he kissed her and the witches spell broke and they lived happily ever after.

Don't get me wrong I (like any other mother) want my daughter to be happy. I want her to one day find true love and get marry and have beautiful children.

I do not want my 6 year old thinking about marriage or about gay people. I want her to think about toys and games and school. Not about marriage.

This hit my like a rock. I have allowed her to watch movies and read this stories. I have decorated her room with castles and princesses who have happily ever after stories in which they fall in love with their perfect prince and now she has this mentality of I must marry the perfect man when she is only 6!!

How in the world did this happened? And most importantly how do I fix it? Can I fix it?