I must be doing something right. I took my 6 yr old this morning to the Dr. She had a fever and was not feeling well.
After waiting for a while she looks at me straight in the eyes and says "mami, you are a very good mom, you are my very good mom." OMG!!!!!!!!!
I mean i dont consider myself a bad mom.
I, like many others, will do anhything for my children but when y daughter said that I felt incredibly proud of myself.
Sure it's good to hear someone else say you are doing a good job but your own kid?! This is one of those things that I will remember even in those days when everything else is going wrong. When everything else is falling apart this will keep me up!
August 14, 2009
Ah children! I have 2 girls. A 6yrs old and a 10 month old. I'm also pregnant with our 3rd child a baby boy. I'm about 37 weeks pregnant now. I know we didn't wait! Well the other day I was having lot's of back pressure and some contractions. I left work and went home to relax and ease off my back pain. Since I got home early my hubby asks me if something was wrong and of course I tell him that I don't feel well. My 6yr old is such a sweet kid. She looks at me in the bed tossing and turning and says "mami, do you want me to call the doctor". "You know what, let me get the phone. I'm going to call the doctor and tell him that you don't feel well" she continues. I, of course, feel moved by this act of love. Being that my hubby didn't even moved from the sofa he was sitting on when I walk in. I felt like WOW at least someone cares. You know how it is when you are pregnant (for the woman) you get those "oh I'M SO PREGNANT" moments. I explain to her that mommy was OK and that it was not time for the baby to arrive. You will think she will drop it and let it be. Well to my surprise she keeps insisting. "mami you need to go to the doctor. You are not OK. What is the doctor's phone number, I'll dial it just like you call when I'm sick" she says. Oh my god! My heart just melted. She was so worried that mommy was in pain and that she was not OK that she was willing to call the doctor. Now tell me that is not sweet. You see, I don't want you to think that I'm one of those sucker mommies that goes ah! for every little thing their kid does. But come on, the kid was really worried. Remember she is only 6 and instead of going back to watching cartoons she stays by the bathroom door while I take a shower to make sure I'm ok. She then goes with me and lays in bed until I felt better. Now how many kids do you know that will do something like that. Not many! I guess it is true what they say "If you raise your kid with kindness, he or she will be kind to other's" including you!!!
As you probably know by now, I'm a heavy set woman. Thankfully I'm well proportioned and have weight in all the right places. That of course includes my breast. I'll say I have more than most and I'm happy with them. About a month ago I was shopping with my daughter. We like to shop in this particular chain store and we use the self check out lane. I just think is convinient with children because this way the cashier doent give you the dirty look when you take long getting your wallet out to pay or when your child's starts to nag. I had some issues with the scanner and one of the clerks came to my aid. Well it so happen's she was an older lady, around her 50's. As you well know stuff start hanging way before then. She was not the exception. I have to tell you her boobs were HUGE. And for a woman my size to say that someone's boobs are big, trust me they have to be BIG. They must have been twice my size and I'm a 40 DD. So go ahead and picture it!! They were big. She had one of those pointy bras that fall down and make your breast look like a snow cone. And don't get me wrong I'm not discriminating. I don't personaly like those bras, they just don't look good on me but some people do like them, and that is fine. I have to tell you that I was surprise and still staring at her boobs when my daugther brought me back when she said "mommy her boobies are bigger than yours!!" Oh! the earth could have just opened and swallow me!? You just don't know. They lady was right there when she said that. She just finished what she was doing and walked away without saying a word. And I, embarrassed like you could only imagine, hurried up and finished paying and left the store in a rush.
August 13, 2009
About 8 months ago I took my then 5 year old daughter with me to this store (can't remember the name of it) and we did some expedite shopping. You know the can of shopping you do when you children keep asking you "are we done yet?". While in line at the register, my daughter like any other child starts asking for candy. You know the candy the store purposely places by the register knowing that your cranky child would want some and fuss until you give up and by it. To make a long story short, after fussing with her it was our turn to pay. I'm busy trying to make sure I'm not being overprice and that the items on sale are scan properly, you know doing what every savvy shopper will do. When my daughter looks at me and asks "mommy is that a boy or a girl?" What?! Could she have not chosen a better time to ask that?! I looked up and realize that the person at the register is a Butch (my friend's definition for a woman who dresses like a man and looks like a man). My first instinct was to ssh her. And then I realize that she has to right to ask. I felt kind of bad for the lady at the register but really she is just a kid and as a mom I can't just not answer because then she'll always be with the uncertainty. Of course I didn't answer her in front of the cashier, I waited until we got to the car and explain to her that she is a woman but she likes getting dressed like that and that is why she looks like a boy. Now I'm sorry and I hope I don't get judge for my answer but she is just a kid and a whole lesbian and gay talk was not necessary. Plus I hate people who stereotype just because the gal decided to dress manly. What I can tell you though is that I laughed my heels off in the car because of the innocence involved in the question. I wish that many more people will looked at each other with the same innocence my daughter looked at that lady without judging her.
I'm sure most of you, if not all, watch TV and feel the pressure of having a stereotype-ideal-perfect body. I'm sure everyone at one point in their lives wished they have that divine perfect body. Taller, maybe just a few extra inches just to feel better about yourself. Longer hair, maybe just a few inches also to feel better you know like the model of the Victoria Secret commercials who move their hair and it looks so shiny and sexy. Slimmer, maybe just a few less pounds or a few extra pounds just to complement the rest of you. Maybe less from the hips and more in the tush. Perhaps less thighs and more breasts; or maybe more tone arms and abs. Oh yeah, definitely toned abs. Something similar to what you had before that pretty baby was born. And of course if we could take an eraser and erase those motherly stretch marks from the different parts of our bodies "life would be better". How about wrinkles. Yep, those not so nice lines we get in out face and neck specially under and around our eyes. Those things we can't get rid off no matter how expensive the cream might be. Those nasty lines that makes us afraid of asking "how old do you think I'm?" Well I was one of those skinny wanna be women for a very Long time until i realize that i could not hold my life back thinking on how nice it will be if had that body. Why? Simple.I'm no longer that woman. Now I'm the other woman. The one I choose to be. The mom. the wife. The com penetration of those two women together. That's what makes me a better person. The woman who made his day when he heard "we are going to have a baby". The woman who when the day arrived gave what she didn't have to push that baby out and bring him to this world. The same woman who even though she was in A LOT OF PAIN she still found words of love to calm him down because he was going crazy not knowing exactly what to do now that the baby was here. The woman who gets ups early to make sure the baby is ready for school or daycare, on time. The same one who is not at ease if her partner leaves to work on an empty stomach no matter how much he pissed her off the night before. The same one that when driving with the hubby reminds him over and over to "please put on your seat belt" and not because your expecting something bad to happen but because in case it does you want to make sure he has a chance of living. The woman who will stay up all night if her baby is sick, just to try to comfort her and ease her pain and kiss her bu-bu good bye. The same one who will wake up in the middle of the night to give him medicine because he caught the baby's flu and after all he's also your baby. The one who will forget she has to eat thanks to focusing on making sure the baby eats the veggies and they don't end up on the floor, who we all know doesn't need the vitamins they have. The same one who will prepare all kind of different recipes until she discover what type of food her man likes since she still doesn't know despite the fact you've asked a thousands times. The woman who doesn't enjoy the beach because she is more worry that their skin will get a sun burn. I choose to be that woman. And not the one that cares about the other useless crap. Don't get me wrong I care about my appearance. In fact I'm very conceited. I put on makeup everyday. I get my hair done and put on cream and sunblock before I leave my house. But I'm not obsessed. I've learned to be happy the way I'm. I've learned to live happy in the body I have, the one he loves and caresses. I've learned to accept the woman he met and felt in love with and enjoy all that lives got to give!!
Some women spend their entire childhood dreaming about princesses and how they meet their prince and live happily ever after.
I'm one of the weird ones, I was never like. Even now as an adult, I've been engaged for a few months now and think of my wedding day but not in the way that other women do.
Don't get me wrong I WANT TO GET MARRIED! I love the guy. I describe him as my other half. The man I argue with in a daily basis, the one that makes me get upset like no one else can. And when it comes to our wedding day I envision it as a beautiful sunny day in Spring in which we will both bow to love each other and be there no matter how much we get on each other's nerves.
I'm just against the whole HAPPILY EVER AFTER thing.
I'm sorry but that is just some crazy thing someone invented to make women believe that if their man is not perfect like the ones on TV then there is something wrong with him.
I realize that the other night while watching the movie Obsessed. There's a scene in which the husband sends her flowers because is Monday and that is something he has done for the past 3 years. For a moment I thought that is so sweet and I wanted to ask Ben why he is not like that with me.
Luckily I stop myself.
After careful thinking I realized I don't need him to be like that for me to be happy. Different men have different ways of expressing their love. Mines might not send me flowers every Monday but he has other qualities that sometimes get over looked like the fact that he listens to me. Unlike many men who don't hear a bit of what their woman says mines pays a lot of attention to the things I say. So much that sometimes I say stuff I forgot I said and wish I would have never said.
to give you a quick example the other night we were watching TV and the commercial for the same movie, Obsessed, came up on TV. We had a friend over and I said "I would love to watch that movie". Now keep in mind he was in the kitchen talking about something else. I could have sworn he had not heard me but 2 nights later he made a quick trip to Walmart and rented the movie. At first I dint even tough about it but as I'm sitting on my desk today trying to keep myself busy I realized that he loves me enough to pay attention to what I say and get it for me. Now you are going to tell me that is not a man who cares about his woman!
Think about it. I didn't had to tell him to get it for me, he just did. And looking back this is not the first time he does this. It's just the first time I took the time to notice.
He has his flaws but he is sweet as well.
I just honestly think that we spend too much time fantasizing with the charming prince in knight and armor that will come through our door and sweep us off our feet's. Don't get me wrong and think I'm a sour person. There are women out there that who find this magic prince and have a fairy tale wedding and a fairy tale live but there are also other woman (like me) who do not dream on the fairy tale wedding and who do not feel that the perfect man is the one that never does something wrong.
I like the man that makes me feel alive. The one I argue with because he leaves things out of place. The same one that I miss when he is not home leaving stuff out of place. The real man.
The one that most of us have and don't appreciate because we are always dreaming about how good our lives will be if we had a man like_________.
All I'm saying is that is time to wake up and start seeing the good we have in front of us. That one we overlook in a daily basis. That same one we wish to have once their gone.
Fairytale stories are good for little girls to keep them away from the harsh world but when it comes to us real women we need to wake up and smell the often taken for granted awesome man that lays in bed next to us every night, the one that does silly things and that although he doesn't have a shinning armor he sweeps us off our feet.